My husband has lost his intellectual edge as of late. He's becoming forgetful, absent-minded, oblivious. How does this relate to the wood filler you ask? Well, it's like this. We are currently doing some projects around the house. This has placed Carlos at Home Depot several times. His visits have resulted in 3 individual purchases of wood fillers. At least he has a permanent affinity to Elmer's products each time. Alzheimer's here we come.

Noel's first piece of furniture. Thank you Craig's List.

love note

sometimes i leave little love notes for carlos in his car. i find this one particularly sentimental, don't you?

on bella

can i just say that i am really enjoying bella these days. she has hit this phase of development that has made me stop and realize i am not raising a child, i am raising a person. i know that's not so profound but it is for me. she has such adult mannerisms, opinions, likes, & thoughts that make her so individualistic to me. all my kids are this way of course, but cora is like her auntie shay. always ahead of the game, a quick learner, a marrow sucker, she wants it all and she wants to experience it now.

my favorites with her right now are how feminine she is. she has this girl thang down! mason has been on this "manly, man" kick as of late. he'll point out what a manly man would or wouldn't do. you know, testocerone at its finest type stuff. he pointed something out that cora did and told her that's how a manly man would do it. she replied, "but i don't want to be a manly man, i want to be a womanly woman." that would be cora. she loves to color coordinate her outfits, she loves to accessories with bows, jewelry, and purses. she is a shoe pig. she has the most shoes in the family and she always wants more. she has this pout that she's recently developed and she uses it in perfect female cue for maximum results. she'll turn her thin little lips into a tight heart-shaped pout. i've told her boyfriends and husband will be powerless to it. it works great on daddy.

she is fun, sassy, sweet, sensitive, pouty, dramatic - all things girl. oh, how i love her.

the erekson

a quilt that i began at least a year ago. yikes & ridiculousness. it has a nice swirl pattern to it, pretty traditional. i enjoy the color combination with this one. i saw this pattern in a quilt shop and really liked it. it is simple, clean, boldish. i'm sure i'll do this pattern again.
here she is all laid out. this is a thank-you of sorts to mike and sharon. they so very generously G-A-V-E us an office furniture set when they got new furniture. they are glorious peeps.

dearest husband,

thank you for introducing me to your fat-boys. i had no idea that they even existed let alone fit me. you are truly kind to share with your super-sized wife. you do know that i will be forever "borrowing" them now right?

kisses,

tu vida

the owen

welcome to white trash quilting folks! i am doing a couple of these to just get a few quilts checked off my mental list. i really am such a ridiculous procrastinator. this is for my nephew, now age 3. it is bright and crazy - perfect for a toddler.

this is the back side of the blanket. it is fabric that i bought foreva ago at ikea to make curtains and pillows. another project never gotten too. what's that saying, "the pathway to hell is paved with what...?"

if you look carefully you can see the quilt pattern. i had it done in elephants. too cute in my mere opinion. i hope my nephew enjoys cuddling with this blanket. it was made with love, albeit white-trash love!

the sleep diva

really? how cute is my daughter with her sunglasses dangling off her nose? she fell asleep on the long drive home from arkansas & was too cute to pass up. these are by far my favorite pair of glasses she's ever owned. soooo sassy!

s.w.a.k.

a huge thank you and warm fuzzies to everyone who has called or asked us about out departure of little hayden. family and friends have been so amazing to us. your concern and kindnesses (?) are so, so appreciated. we are slowly doing better. i dreamt of my little blondie this morning and we are all looking around corners trying to find hayden only to realize...but, time does heal, right?

we are off on a vacation. the arkansas air will do us all good!

Kids Camera

We've been letting the kids use our old camera to take pictures around the house of whatever they want. After a couple of weeks, here's a sampling of what the memory card yielded.

We might actually save some of these pictures. Maybe a couple.

dear houston c.p.s.,

tonight i would like you to have a big turd land smack in your eyeballs.

i would love to thank you for the endless tears and wailing that you have given us this evening, even up until 10:49 p.m. cora and cristian appreciate your selfless generosity in allowing them to explore a whole new repertoire of emotions.

can you please forward your claims department address? i need to know where to have their therapy bills reimbursed at.

your obedient servants,

carlos & jen cruz

bleeding

CPS informed us today that our little sweet Hayden is being taken from us tomorrow. He is being placed in another foster home in Houston so he can be near his biological mother. People always ask me how we can do foster care. This moment in time is the reason why so many people veer away from it.

I'm not going to lying to you. This always hurts. You feel torn, hurt, rejected, dejected, angry, sad, hopeful, grief - you feel it all. Hayden has been extra special to our whole family. I don't know the reason why he has except that he is just an amazingly special child.

But what endears me to the human spirit is our ability to regenerate ourselves. A piece of my heart is being ripped out. I'll miss and worry over Hayden for a good while. A then another sweet little spirit will be dropped off on our doorstep. And we will pour all our love and efforts into that child. Because I have learned something these past few years fostering...

It's not about me.

Yes, I hurt and ache. I want Hayden to stay here. We all want him officially adopted into our family. But there are many things we have no control over. And while Hayden, or Jose, or Miguel, or Naila, or Sara, or Christavia, or Evie, or Lily, or Gary, or Natalie, or Terence, or Perry, or Mace are with us they are loved. It's not about me. It's all about them.

We love you Hayden. You'll always be our pickle.

okay shay

here's a little number we bought off of craig's list ($100 i think). it was in great shape, except i wasn't fond of the color and HATED the wood diamonds on the front. those were taken off and smoothed down.

we obviously painted her over and put on new hardware. thank you hobby lobby. she feels very beachish to me and i love the pop of color she adds to my very brown house.

i stained the edges with a walnut-colored stain, but then lost interest in it all. so the bottom half of the unit isn't even done. how ghetto is that? if you wait and live with it long enough you simply forget about it. you should try it.

Soap Box

Okay, look you stupid Mormon moms, I have a serious bone to pick with you. Why are you putting your daughters, regardless of how young they are, in two-piece swim suits? Have we not all been told about modesty especially bikinis since the beginning of time? What is your deal?

Let me guess...

She is just so cute in it. You can't resist!
She isn't being immodest, she is just a little girl.
You'll stop the behavior when she gets older & when it really matters.
There's no harm in it.
You're pleased she can wear one because your glory days are over
You think sexualizing your daughter is awesome.

Um, for starters she'll have photographic evidence of how you dressed her. My huge thing with parenting and how I parent my kids is don't give in to something that I'm not willing to always give in too. I can't pick and choose with my kids when I want to follow a rule or a commandment. It makes for very confused and manipulative kids and piece of crap parenting. I either completely disregard a principle or never bend on it.

Women, grow a backbone. Are you in or out of this religion? Why would you dress up your daughter(s) in provocative, sexualized clothing especially when you have a living prophet telling you the polar opposite? I don't get it.

On awful thought that keeps me especially motivated on this topic is something I have zero control over. The thoughts of other people in public. It disgusts me to think of sick men or boys starring at my daughters because their attire solicit the look. You don't know what kind of people are in public and what they are thinking as they watch your child. I wouldn't put my 5 year old daughter in a triangle bikini top to help stimulate his imagination.

Follow the prophet and cover your girls up. Please.

Our 4th this July - Part One

How adorable is our little Hayden? He loved all the open space of Noel's apartment...

Look at our stow-away. He kept trying to climb inside dad's bag. I didn't bring many toys for him, but let's face it babies would rather play with the electric cords than their toys. It's a fact.

We were busy all three days at Noel's house. All the kids did amazingly well. I am coming to terms with the fact that I just have super well-behaved children. Carlos and I are doing something right!! It was freak'n hot the whole weekend. We came across this fountain and we all got a little wet for kicks.

Here is our fabulous tour guide. She was a little weird, but sweet at the same time. Noel bought a Popsicle from a street vendor - this was in the El Mercado district - and we all jumped on board with various flavors. THE BEST POPSICLES EVA!! By a company called Arco Iris. Noel had watermelon and we bought pina colada, coconut, and strawberry creme. They were so rich, creamy, and refreshing.

Um, this is how we ate them - it's called "family style".

Can't be in El Mercado without a mechanical bull ride now can ya?

Cora looks all pro in this shot. She even took off her hat in true rodeo fashion!

My little Mexican Men. It was nice to have Tijuana right here in Texas!

These masks were so colorful. The boys loved trying them on and pretend they were Nacho Libre. Weirdos.

No thanks. I don't like this look on my boy. Just stay away from Mexican cowboy culture please.

Best Thing/Worst Thing

So a friend of mine has this tradition in her home. I've known about it for a couple of years now and liked it so I don't know why we didn't steal it until a few weeks ago.

It's called "best thing/worst thing" in which you go around the dinner table and each share these two elements of your day. The kids love it & I can usually guess their answers before they speak, but I think it'll be invaluable when they are pre-teens and teens and hate my guts and won't communicate at all. At least we'll have some idea as to what is going on in their daily lives.

This is how it goes thus far: Carlos is always thankful for some aspect of his family or the food we are eating, Cristian usually can't think of a "worst" thing (optimist), Mason rarely can think of a "best" thing (pessimist), Cora's list is usually long and very detailed, it hits a variety of personal injustices, Perry can't narrow it down to 2 of anything and keeps jabbering until we cut it off, & my worst thing usually involves child behavior so I make up something else.

Thanks Robyn - we are enjoying this tradition!!

Bug

Some things never change...
Both Cristian and the walking stick bug are a bit bigger.

and of course, our brave little princess

We found this walking stick bug in Noel's apartment complex while taking a walk one night. We spent the 4th of July at her place in San Antonio.

Joy

This was taken in San Antonio this past weekend. I love this picture of Perry! It captures her perfectly! Happy, carefree, full of life, and a little dirty like a Beyonce video.

There was a large vent in the sidewalk that entertained the kids and I for about 15 minutes. Perry loved having her hair blown wildly and her dress up to her chin. She was laughing and giggling the entire time.

I love simple childhood joys. They make me so happy and it's experiences like this that she'll remember forever.

Cute Kid x 5000

So here is our little family obsession. Hayden is by far the ruler of this home. He is doted on by every person all day long. Even the boys/men spend their days speaking in "motherese".

But can you blame us? The child IS always this smiley. He is such a lover - so sweet and happy. It is unbelievable what he has been through in his first 7 months of life. I see no signs of his past life. He is sweet, happy, affectionate, and (for now) ours!

Stewart's you have to give us your take, but Cora, Paco, and I see glimpses of Reade in him now and again. I thought it to myself but Cora was the first to point it out!

Love that orange vegetable nose! It's amazing what magic one little life can bring to our whole family. We are all totally smitten.

--heavy sigh--

On any given day this is the room of Perry and Cora. Who is the slob you ask? They both are. They can't ever seem to hold it together for longer than half a day. I've basically given up. Anyone care to join me?

I spy...

..with my little eye... a half-grown boy child swaddled in all his bedding on the floor.

Forts are a big deal in this house, especially in the summer time. The kids like to gather all their crap in a pile, tie it all together, & call it good.

Cristian opted to sleep here this particular evening. I go to bed praying we don't have a fire. How would I ever find the kids in time?!

current obsessions

there are a few things that occupy my thoughts this summer. or maybe a few things i am just loving this summer. here goes the nonsensical list:

1. hayden - slathering him with kisses, ogling over his every achievement. like i'm a first-time mom or something.

2. my kids' armpits - i know, totally bizarre, but i love rubbing their soft, little armpits. i'll plop down next to any one of them and say, "pits!" and they know to raise their arms in pointless humiliation. tank tops make them even more irresistible.

3. quilting - i am thinking/dreaming about this a ton. i am doing none of it though. i can't seem to find time and space to do it. and i am NO GOOD after 8 p.m. the lazy gene kicks in and i just want to veg in front of the tele.

4. italian chicken/orzo soup - the recipe will be forthcoming, but i am addicted to this soup right now. i have been making it every week for about 5 weeks. even ALL the kids like it. it is hearty but low-fat. amazing.

5. crest scope outlast - magic -freakin' toothpaste. my mom introduced this to me. for reals, no joke your mouth is minty and fresh for at least 30 minutes after you brush. i've never had a paste do that. it isn't approved by the ADA so i might die in 3 years from its use. i'm taking the gamble.

6. highly chlorinated water - our usual summer staple: the pool. we are there everyday, well 5 days a week. my babies are black, with exception of cora and hayden. i love to my kids happy and active. they adore swimming.

7. craig's list - um, i am having an affair. i can admit that openly now. i could be on craigs list 2 hours a day if i felt totally entitled. the disease has progressed, i've branched out into other cities besides my own. i am often tempted to "see" what for sale across the country. sick, i know.

8. pill popping - this isn't something i want to deal with, but it's become a very real part of each and every day. i think i'm up to 31 pills a day now. i will say i no longer have headaches. i guess amino acids do have their place in this world.

all in the family

I love this drawing that Cora did. It tells me that she too feels whoever is in our home with us IS our family. I love the fact that there are 2 people represented here that aren't a part of our nuclear family but still considered as such. In these moments I am so proud of these kids we are raising & of me for being a rock star of a mom. Welcome to the fam Noel & Hayden!!!

canned nastiness

Wulf & Luli invited us to float the river a couple of weeks ago. It was wonderfully refreshing. The kids had a blast. The water was gorgeously blue-green. Divine.

I didn't want to do "meals" so we dropped fifty bones at the store on the way there on a bunch are garbage. Sometimes it is delightfully fun to do that.

We scattered through the cracker aisle with little hands grabbing and pleading right and left. I knew what I wanted though. Nothing says "floating-down-the-river-with-a-bunch-of-drunk-college-students" like Easy Cheese. I knew the moment my kids tasted the forbidden product that they'd become addicted. I tossed it in the shopping cart as Carlos starred at me wide-eyed.

As predicted, the nasty cheese product was a huge hit. The kids couldn't get enough of it. I finally put a halt on its consumption. Mean mommie!

But then I got mischievous.

We were on to Oreo's by then. Wulf was talking incessantly like he usually is. We were all listening intently because let's face it, he tells a good story. I'm handing out the cookies. I have Carlos twist the top off a cookie. I dab a squirt of easy cheese inside the filling & plop the top back on the cookie. Carlos hands it to Wulf.

Gulp. Gone. Gross.

He doesn't even notice. Carlos & I are laughing like naughty school kids.

Much later we are swimming at a pool. We are all tuckered out. The kids have dragged their exhausted, happy, but hungry bodies out of the water and want food. Wulf has fallen asleep on a picnic bench (as only males can). He's stretched out, bare-chested, almost snoring.

Then I got mischievous, again.

Out comes the spray cheese. I'm laughing just thinking about what I want done. I lean over to my partner (in crime) and tell him to spray some cheese in Wulf's belly button. Carlos laughs and whispers there's no way he's doing that. He and I are both silently laughing.

In steps Luli, "I'll do it." She grabs the can and sprays a generous portion of florescent orange in his hairy little naval. We start laughing out loud as Wulf swipes at his stomach thinking it a bug. In the process his hand becomes cheesed. He opens his eyes and looks at his hand. His look was SO worth it.

He's amused and grumbling about our prank. I'm almost peeing my pants. The kids are excited and laughing every which way you look. And that's when Kaira walks up to her daddy and digs out a chunk of bellybutton cheese and eats it.

Double nasty.

SAY WHAT?!?

I was fixing a shelf in Cristian's room and Mason was the one observer in the room. As I took the shelf down, Mason noticed that Cristian had put a small portrayal of Jesus hanging on a cross on the side of his shelf. And the following conversation ensued.

Mason: Dad, can I get a picture of a dead Jesus on my shelf too?

Dad: Mason, how about we put a picture of a live Jesus on your shelf?

Mason: Okay...pause...What about if we put picture of a live Jesus and a dead Jesus on my shelf?

evil little me

just got off the phone with hayden's cps worker. i asked how his mom was doing. was she anxious and missing him terribly. we've had him a month now. he has grown 2 new teeth, started crawling and sitting up, and eats his solids like a pro now.

the worker said mom is very anxious and is doing everything she can to get him back. this is where evil steps in. not the answer i wanted to hear. i'd like to hear that she's taken off and can't be found. that's a really good sign. not that she is ready to work her services. but, come on the point is to have her reunited with her son after she has made permanant life changes.

i just really want her to fail. so i can adopt her child.

honesty is great thing, but it usually makes me just come off creepy.

On Pessimism

Thought I'd give you a synopsis of the Cruz marriage. I suppose it is one of the reasons we work well together. Good and bad to both personalities.

Anywho...I had a friend ask me to watch her kids yesterday. Well, only four of her six kids...I was glad to do it because I really like her kids. I mean I really do like her children, they are sweet and hilarious. And then it was one of those situations that I get myself into WAY too often when I actually think after I've committed.

Why did I agree to have 9 children under the age of 10 for 8 hours?! Am I totally moronic? So, I set up all the scenarios of how awful and stressful this day is going to be - hence the title. Mason won't have anyone to play with and will whine all day, Cristian and the boys will run wild in the house & be stinky, Cora will be emotionally devastated because they're aren't any girls her age, Perry will boss the babies around and drive me nuts, etc.

And then the day happens...Shane & Logan are ridiculously helpful with polished manner's to boot, Josh ignores me all day BUT adores Hayden all day, Perry & Abby play along blissfully well, Cora & Logan play a few games together, Shane talks Cristian's ears off, some lame Godzilla movie entertains all 19 kids for 80 minutes, they all love my lunch, no one drowns in the pool nor pees in it, Hayden sleeps well, the bottom 4 play trains for an hour while I make dinner, and Bug, Shane, and Logan tear apart Cristian's room.

It was a perfect day.

Now I'm not say'n pessimism is where it's at, but when you assume the worst and life doesn't come close to it - well, then you start look'n at the flip side....which is called optimism.

b.e.s.t.i.e.s.

bella has several best friends and i imagine she always will.

i took hayden, mace, and bella out on a walk this evening and i suggested we stop by and pick up madison.

maddy has been in her class this year at school. i think i like her very much. she is a sweet, smiley girl. fair haired, fair skinned with a large circular face. she has been good to cora and that goes a long way with me.

so we pick her up and proceed on our twenty minute jaunt. i'm yaking with mace and pushing the stroller. the girls are pleasantly talking with one another. i look back and see them arm in arm walking.

it was so jane austen to me. they needed parasols and stuffy, feminine dresses to make it complete. every time they'd separate for one reason or another, they'd re lock their arms and continue walking. shouldn't we all have such lovely friendships?

New Me

So this is my new church calling - the mighty Webelos Den Leader. The church's version of this position is way more lax than if you joined a community troop. That has its advantages and disadvantages. However, I am loving this calling so far.

Cristian will move into my class or den in September when he turns 10. For now, I have three of his best friends who I adore. The den is loud, wild, and sweet. They are darling boys. I am loving teaching a short lesson on some life skill. That is so up my ally it is ridiculous. Plus, I just got an assistant that I am excited to be working with. She is creative and not a slacker. We should be a good little team.

Um, do I look good in yellow and blue?

Biding my time...

So this was the conversation today...

Me: "Noelie is going to a dance tonight."

Perry: "Noel is getting married today?!"

Multiply that kind of conversation by 50 and you'll have any day with Perry. By 11 a.m. I am ready to kick it up to death mode.

I am really hoping this is a 4 year-old thing because I don't have the patience for it all.

27

So I have this amazingly brilliant friend. The great Catherine Brown. Um, I adore her because of her brain, her rationale, and her sense of humor. There are lots of perks to having a brilliant friend. Especially if that brilliant friend has a lazy friend such as moi.

Catherine loves medicine but is annoyed with doctors. So she researches and studies and puts things together. Which means that I can go to her with all my medical anomalies and she tells me what to do about them. I love it.

This symbiotic relationship - although I'm not sure what I bring to the friendship in return - means that Catherine has found me my "crazy witch doctor" as Carlos has lovingly dubbed her. Catherine and I are both current patients of the good doctor. She is a gynecologist who has branched out into bio identical hormone therapies.

Long story short, she has analyzed just about every fluid that my body produces and came back with this verdict: you are a mess! Validation on paper does make me feel good. So now I am on 27 pills per day. Cora was appalled at my pill popping practices. I have to take pills throughout the whole day: 7 am, 8 am, 11 am, noon, 4 pm, 5 pm, 8 pm, 10 pm. Um, its very time-consuming and I feel like generalized crap the whole day. I'm on mainstream things like thyroid, vit. D, and cortisone, but the rest are supplements that are insanely expensive.

I really hope this works...

Whip it, whip it good

I don't know what it's like at your house, but I am always the one to "crack the whip". I have instituted Saturday mornings as work days. It has been met with much enthusiasm (by me). As you see demonstrated, Cora is having an emotional crisis becuase sweeping the porch is so awful.

Cristian is beyond bored while he preps the van for a good vacuuming. He loves to see what "junk" he can salvage from the car. It affords me the pleasure of going through his room bi-monthly disposing of his "treasures".

Perry is hard at work eating pizza for breakfast. She needed a break and took it diva style in her pink car seat.

Mason was in the groove. He enjoyed ripping out the many weeds in the yard. He is quite the plucky fellow and got a big 'ol pile going.

Impending

Just keeping you all in the loop. Carlos and I birthed another child. We birthed a 7 month-old. And he finally looks a lot like his mama.

Brilliant blue eyeballs and a bald head of blond fuzz. His name is Hayden & word on the street is that we'll have him for about 18 months. We aren't looking to adopt again, but we've all fallen hook, line, and sinker for him if the opportunity rises.

Yeah, we know. We're crazy. But saintly crazy right? Adoption has done something addictive to us & like a drug we just can't say 'no'.

I'd love to post a snapshot of the little fellow. But no one has come forward with our piece of crap missing camera. (I'm turning into Shay - no camera!) He has a great smile - totally different than Perry's great smile, but contagious like hers.

We'll keep you posted...

How Could You Do That!?

Here's a new little segment inspired by my darling husband.

One of his best husbandly attributes is that he likes whatever I make for dinner. This goes a l-o-n-g way in my book because I don't need one more person in this house talking to me like I'm their personal waitress.

However...the past couple of years Paco has been harnessing his inner Latino. This is all well and good until it's Italian night at our house. He has been caught red-handed (or brown-handed) several times throwing salsa or Tapatio on my prepared meal. That makes me go a little berserk.

If I made a basic, bland casserole I say go for it. Throw all of Mexico on top if it's what you need to choke it down. But there is no salsa on my lasagna. Not allowed.

So the other night I made a yummy Asian stir fry. It was an actual recipe and so delish! There goes my man, slicing up an avocado and stirring it into his bowl. What!? It's like you are pooping on my creation. Fortunately for me, Noel (who is always on Carlos' side and a perpetual voice of reason) even said no to that one. Not allowed.

I'm sure there will be many entries into this segment. Cristian is a salsa duplicate of his father and Mace just does gross food combos as is.

See you soon...

SAY WHAT?!?

October 29, 2006
Sunday

Today was the end of daylight savings time. Cristian and I were about to play a game downstairs & Cristian said, "Mrs. Richter told us we need to turn our clocks around." I asked him if she didn't say "turn your clocks back", but he assured me that she said 'around' so he ran upstairs and turned his clock "around".

When I went upstairs later, sure enough, the clock was facing the wall!

--Dad

the deal is...

so maybe i've become lazy or maybe carlos and i are like two ships in the night or both. we've lost our camera (great) so...me.no.bloggie! trust me, life and stuff has been going on, there's just no record of it. if anyone finds our piece of crap camera...call me.

Melt Away

This child does it to me every time. I can't get over his gorgeous almond eyes and chubby little cheeks. He is becoming more and more handsome. Lately, he'll sneak into our bed in the wee hours of the morning. It bugs Paco but I personally love it. I missed his first 2 years of life - that is a lot of snuggle time wasted. I love that he comes in to sleep between us. It means he loves to be near us, that he's safe, he finds comfort with us, but mostly, that he wants something from us. He is fiercely independent. He creates a facade that he doesn't care or need anyone, but in truth he is probably our most sensitive child. He climbs into bed because he needs to be with us. It's always a different reason: he's cold, bad dream, he needed someone to be with, we woke up early, etc. But I'll take him any day for any reason. He is my darling little Mace.

SAY WHAT?!?

I had a friend stop by the house the other day. It was her first time to the house and she asked to see our backyard. You know, it's springtime, we're all planting our gardens - yawdee, yawdee, yawdee. The kids were out on the tramp so as she peeked out the door they all saw her.

Mason looks over at her and says, very casually, "Oh, hi Shay- Shay." This friend looks SO much like Shalynn. I corrected him telling him she does look so much like her.

He got off the tramp and walked into the house, very excited to talk to her.

He starts talking her ear off, all animated about life in general when he says, "Hey guess what?! Sometimes I like to smell myself."

WHAT!??

I was left laughing and she took it all in stride. Too funny that kid!

SAY WHAT?!?

June 2005
Age 2.5
Cora

"Mom, when I have my own kids, can I call you Jennifer?"

I gave her a definite "No!"