Cruz Chatter: January 2009

Wednesday, January 28

Marital Cravings

Dear Mister Cruz,

Yesterday your were trying on your jeans that you haven't worn for awhile. Oh, goodness you put on your 34 slim fit Mr. Cruz.

I understood what it was like for a moment to be a man.

You men are visual creatures. How awful to be a slave to your eyeballs. But the sight of you in those jeans on your hot little Mexican legs was fantastic!

And you better not delete/edit this post. It is important for our kids to know that their Mama thought their daddy was H-O-T!

Um, I wouldn't mind if you walked around the house awhile in noth'n but those jeans baby. You make me weak in the knees.

I love you. You will always be my luscious Mexican man!

Tu Vida

La Cucaracha

Yeah, so okay this IS my hand holding a cockroach. Oh goodness, I think of something Oprah said once about her aversion to getting married. Something to the fact as why would she marry anyone because of how she'd change and he'd change through the years and who is to say they'd stay together because they'd be completely different people in 50 years. As a side note I think her theory is a load of crap, BUT I often think how I have evolved in ten years of marriage. Case in point, me touching a cockroach.

So, this is Wulf's Christmas present to me. I guess I disappointed him. He was going for a screaming, yelling response from me. Sorry Wulf, but there's always next year.

I think roaches are repulsive. But this isn't an ordinary roach. I mean he's actually pretty in a way. He has a smooth exoskeleton and pretty orange/brown coloring, etc. He doesn't fly or move fast, he just sits there on ya. He is from Madagascar and is called a Hissing Cockroach because he hisses through his abdomen when threatened.

Oh, and we found out that he is actually a she. And I concluded that she is probably pregnant because that would be MY life right?

People keep them as pets which I don't want to do but we basically are. I mean who cares if there's is one less roach in the world? Not me, but how do I kill a 4-inch roach? It is going to squirt everywhere and crunch. Yuck. Should I just freeze it or what?

Any suggestions? And why is my life so random and weird? Why am I HOLDING a cockroach in my hand!?!

Sister-in-Sin

Dear Shay,

Today I went out to dinner with you. I must say you weren't much of a conversationalist. You didn't even have a food-O over the pad tai, with tofu I might add. Okay, since you weren't REALLY there I'll tell you the ins-&-outs of our meal. Even though it was quite chilly outside I had a hankering for a Thai iced tea. Good-bye word of wisdom. Shhh, it's our little secret! I even had the space cadet waitress who is so sweet. I asked her the ingredients for the tea and guess what baby - I got it!!!! That means in less than a week you and I will be sipp'n iced teas like mad women. You're not nursing and caffeine IS good for all my headaches right? I will play with the recipe here and hopefully have it perfected by next week. By the way, I drank two - one for each of us.

Oh, and to prove that this is actually a sign from God...I opened my fortune cookie at a stop light and this is what it said, "PEOPLE FIND IT DIFFICULT TO RESIST YOUR PERSUASIVE MANNER." That's got you, me and Thai iced tea written all over it!

See you soon.
Your sister-in-sin,
Jen

P.S. Our lucky numbers are 11 28 30 33 41 44 - whatever.

Wednesday, January 21

Our Christmas Manger

I thought we'd start a new tradition since we have children in abundance around here. I assigned roles to each kid while my stage hand, Carlos, designed their costumes. Perry was the angel who appeared to the Shepherds. She has called herself an angel ever since this event. Cora was Mary. She placed dibs on this immediately thinking she got the best part only to be disgruntled when I pulled out the angel card. Typical. Cristian was Joseph, Mason was a Shepherd. They put on a painful 3-minute performance for Paw-Paw, the Vance's, and the Pruetts(?). It was cute enough. Oh, and the Christ child was played by a preemie cabbage patch baby.

Tuesday, January 20

Enamel & Fairies

Well, my dear little Cora you are gone to school today and you have been on my mind. I wonder how happy and proud you are showing off your empty gap in your lower row of teeth. Are you thrilled about being in the coveted "Toothless Club" at school? This is important stuff in kindergarten. You worked so hard pulling that little calcium deposit out. I told you it was like having a baby because you and I appreciate dramatic flair. And since you worked so hard for that tooth I thought I would tell you the story behind Tooth Fairies.

You and Cristian already know that fairies can be male or female. And you know that they have some magical properties because of all the sparkle they leave behind after whisking away your teeth. But why do the fairies even want our old teeth? It seems so odd doesn't it?

Well, fairies are very delicate, fragile even. Not just because they are small and can be smashed to bits easily, but they are fragile in their hearts and in their feelings. Fairies are actually quite bothersome. They are always whining and complaining when they are away from Tooth-topia. They are no fun to be around in the least. Fairies are known to complain, weep, whine, nag. They never are pleasant or happy. But it isn't their fault - they are made that way. Well, they were such a miserable lot that eventually all the woodland creatures banished them to only live together far from where any could hear their negativity.

And so it went on this way for hundreds of years. Until, quite by accident, it was discovered that when a fairy held a human tooth their personality changed. They became pleasant, selfless, kind, courageous, happy. This discovery stirred the fairies into action. They organized themselves into teams, each responsible for different areas of the world. And each evening as sleep envelopes the land they set out to work. They ever so quietly sneak into bedrooms across the globe exchanging money for precious teeth.

Now teeth are made from a strong substance called enamel. Enamel is even stronger than your bones Cora. This rare material is what changes the fairies personalities. Enamel give them joy, courage, hope, kindness. It doesn't do this for humans. But the fairies cleverly found out that this enamel is magic to them. They collect all the children's teeth and fly home to Tooth-topia. In this dazzling white city, there are castles, buildings, stores, and homes ALL made from one thing - TEETH! The fairies have figured out that when they are surrounded by children's teeth they are much happier. Some fairies choose not to be tooth fairies. They are not allowed to live in Tooth-topia if they are unwilling to work as all the others do. They are required to live elsewhere. They never become happy, helpful fairies. I fact, in time they become only selfish, greedy, and bothersome until they loose their fairy status and turn into wasps or mosquitoes.

My little Cora, your first tooth has been a great contribution to Tooth-topia. I am confidant that all the good fairies marvel at how beautiful your first tooth is, how strong the enamel is that keeps them happy and carefree. Fairies will build your tooth into a special tooth monument where it will be gazed upon and marveled at for all to see.

Friday, January 16

It's Coming!!

So tomorrow is the BIG day! Tomorrow our family will be sealed in the San Antonio Temple! The foster and adoption process takes you through a myriad of emotions and scenarios. We were always on some part of the roller coaster of emotions for the past 29 months. But I must admit that once we knew Mason and Perry were with us to stay, all I could think of was the temple sealing.

They were returned to their biological mother a while back. That was a long and tedious separation. About two weeks before they left I couldn't take it anymore. I don't even remember where the kids were, maybe they were in a visit with their mom because I know I approached their CPS worker and told her I needed to talk to her privately. She took me to her office. I let loose. The tears were running fluidly. Despite my flood, I gave a logical defense to my feelings. I told her that I had a lot of concerns - things that I knew mom wasn't able to do for the kids. There were things I didn't feel she completed for the well-being of the kids. This was a ridiculous platform. CPS gently told me they understood my concerns, but they were still being returned. I moved on to how confusing and scary this was going to be for Perry and Mason, how attached they were to Cora and Bug, to the both of us. Again, empathy, but a no go. I finally pulled out the big guns. What was largest on my mind and imprinted everywhere in my heart. "Emily," I said, "I am telling you that this is wrong. These kids belong in our family. They belong with us. Carlos and I knew it the first night they were with us. They just fit."

It was a very confusing time for me when they left. I had to honor the law. I knew the laws were there to protect the masses. I knew we were helpless. It was futile to fight against all this. I knew when they left that was the end of it. It was so hard to wrestle and compartmentalize all my feelings and intuition. It had all felt too right. And here it had all unraveled. I do what I am expert at and just didn't think about it. I just didn't deal and moved forward.

Five weeks later our foster agency calls up. Angela is unusually chipper. She always was when she had a placement for us. "Guess what Jen?" she gushed. "I have a couple of kiddos for ya!" You need to imagine the thickest southern drawl possible when thinking of Angela. I groaned inside at the thought of not one, but two new kids in the home right now. "Really," I replied. "Yeah," she's about to explode, "and their names are Tony and Chula!!" That was the beginning of the rest of all our lives. They came home that evening looking disheveled, bitten up, and dirty. But they were home. I will spend the rest of my life filling in all their holes, teaching them what family is, letting them know how magnificent they are.

Tomorrow is the offical beginning of our forever.