Mama bought a new brand of toilet paper last week in an effort to experiment and save a few quarters. No biggie, but, sadly it was somewhat of an exciting adventure for me. After a couple of days in the bathrooms one of my children approached me with their thoughts on the new paper. It was like "fabric but didn't bend every good." Amazingly, I had had very similar thoughts.
Now, pray tell, which of my four children would be so observant and articulate on such a topic?
a) Cristian
b) Mason
c) Cora
d) Perry
Happy voting!
Wednesday, June 24
Double Punishment
Mason is at a lovely phase in his 4-year old life and that phase is called, "let's touch other peoples privates." He's been kicking Bug in the groin, slapping his sister's bum, and finally put his hand down Cora's shirt. That was more than enough. It was time for the spanking.
So I sat down with him again and gave a thorough explanation of why that is NOT alright. We went over where our "private" areas are located. And then came the consequences. I explained that from now on there would be spankings if this happened. He thought he was in the clear. Not so.
I told him to pull down his shorts and undies. The panic set in. Then he pulled the act of desperation. When he and Perry are going to get spanked by me, they start crying and start begging for dad to be allowed to do it. This is because mom spanks a heck of a lot harder than dad. I was sick of this game too. So I called his bluff.
"Oh, you want daddy to spank you?"
Dramatic whimpering, "Yes."
"Okay," I replied brightly, turning back to Carlos who was in the room behind us. "Paco, Mason would like you to spank him after I spank him."
Whimpering instantly stops. Look of confusion/horror replace his face.
I was loving this.
Mason backtracks. "No, I want daddy to spank me!"
"He is Mason. He will spank you after me. I don't know why you want 2 spankings, but if you want it, we'll give it to you."
Hysterics set in. I had Carlos go first because I do spank harder. I wanted to leave him with a lovely lasting impression.
Poor Carlos. He always cringes when he has to spank. This time was no different. I, on the other hand, feel nothing. It's very symbolic of our personalities, no?
So I sat down with him again and gave a thorough explanation of why that is NOT alright. We went over where our "private" areas are located. And then came the consequences. I explained that from now on there would be spankings if this happened. He thought he was in the clear. Not so.
I told him to pull down his shorts and undies. The panic set in. Then he pulled the act of desperation. When he and Perry are going to get spanked by me, they start crying and start begging for dad to be allowed to do it. This is because mom spanks a heck of a lot harder than dad. I was sick of this game too. So I called his bluff.
"Oh, you want daddy to spank you?"
Dramatic whimpering, "Yes."
"Okay," I replied brightly, turning back to Carlos who was in the room behind us. "Paco, Mason would like you to spank him after I spank him."
Whimpering instantly stops. Look of confusion/horror replace his face.
I was loving this.
Mason backtracks. "No, I want daddy to spank me!"
"He is Mason. He will spank you after me. I don't know why you want 2 spankings, but if you want it, we'll give it to you."
Hysterics set in. I had Carlos go first because I do spank harder. I wanted to leave him with a lovely lasting impression.
Poor Carlos. He always cringes when he has to spank. This time was no different. I, on the other hand, feel nothing. It's very symbolic of our personalities, no?
Monday, June 22
Earl Girl
Natalie, I have a creative itch that only be scratched with the sewing machine. Lucky you, you are the recipient of the finished project - whatever it may be. But you know me, you can expect "it" around February next year!How many people can fit into a small bathroom?
It takes just one tornado warning to find out.
This is a view from our living room looking into our bathroom late Thursday, June 11. There was a tornado warning in the area and we fit 4 adults and 6 children into one small bathroom. Carlos was taking the picture and if a tornado did strike he would basically jump on the group like he was crowd surfing and kick the door shut. Luckily, no one had the 'urge' to go.
If you've been in our house, you'd see what a small space this really is. The pictures are a bit low quality because they were taken with Jen's cell phone camera. The camera was in the car and, well...no one was about to go out of the house for just a camera.
This is a view from our living room looking into our bathroom late Thursday, June 11. There was a tornado warning in the area and we fit 4 adults and 6 children into one small bathroom. Carlos was taking the picture and if a tornado did strike he would basically jump on the group like he was crowd surfing and kick the door shut. Luckily, no one had the 'urge' to go.
If you've been in our house, you'd see what a small space this really is. The pictures are a bit low quality because they were taken with Jen's cell phone camera. The camera was in the car and, well...no one was about to go out of the house for just a camera.
Sunday, June 21
A Lovely Man
It is FATHER'S DAY, the day to celebrate the wonderfulness of CARLOS. Our family has hit the jackpot with you as our daddy and husband. It is more apparent to me as time drifts by and the role of men in our society becomes less sacred and vital to the family. I love it that you model for our boys how to be man and not a male. You teach them work, honesty, integrity, and honor. You make the girls feel beautiful and special and treat them like little queens in training. I love that not only our family benefits from you. You are a mentor and father to Noel and Shay. You genuinely love and care for each member of my family and would do anything good for them.
You are always gentle, forgiving, and patient - especially with me. You accept my grouchy ways and praise my noteworthy ones. You have always worked hard to provide for our little family. 
You are always willing to jump right in with the kids when you walk through the door and never deny me a midnight Sonic run.You are just a lovely man.
Saturday, June 20
Six Flags San Antonio
Here's our day at Six Flags. We went with our friends, the Jensen's. They got us in fo' free. Not bad right? Perry and Emily here in the throws of best-friendhood. They are often inseparable & didn't disappoint.
The Riddler! We asked him to tell us a riddle and he had a few up his sleeve. It is a good thing the kids were standing in front of him because his lime green ensemble was pretty tight!
Cora, Mason, & Jake on this silly little ride that they all loved for some reason. They rode it about 4 times.
This was a beautiful carousel that we found at the close of the evening. The animals were just gorgeous and painted in vivid enamel colors. There is something so magical and pure about a carousel. We all enjoyed a few rounds.
The Green Lantern. I have no idea who he is, but I was told that he is a 'good guy'. We bought all the kids superhero capes which have been worn regularly by all since the purchase. Bug had the Riddler, Cora had Supergirl, and Maosn & Perry the classic ... Superman.
Redemption
Sometimes even perfect husbands say insensitive things. But, hey these are gorgeous flowers - they are very similar to my wedding bouquet. Aah, younger days...
Friday, June 19
30
Getting back to my triathlon training.... I had been very discouraged because I have seen no results from all my working out. Don't get me wrong, I am firmer and have nasty quad muscles now, but haven't lost one stink'n pound!
I also have been unusually irritable since training, like chronic PMS. Not fun for anyone affected. So I decided to go have my blood checked. Surely my cholesterol has been affected by 1 and 2-hour workouts 5x a week right?
I talk to my nurse practitioner who happens to be participating in Noel and Shay's same triathlon. She too is perplexed by my fatness. She mildly insinuates that I may not be working out as much as I confess to be. At which point I mentally slap her strongly across her size 2 face. Boy, I hope she doesn't read my blog cuz my co-pays will increase fo' sure.
So we take some blood work. She says my testosterone levels may have increased with all my imaginary working-out. GREAT! Wrestlers quads and a full beard, oh and I'm still fat. Are we getting the visual here?
I got my lab results back and....GUESS WHAT?! My cholesterol has dropped 30 whoop'n points!! My LDL has dropped 30 points while HDL has gone up 2 points (that's good news). So basically my emaciated doctor has to now believe that I am working out. I am so proud of my body. And let me tell you, I needed some validation of what I am doing. I told Noel, "If there isn't a significant drop in my cholesterol I'm going to sit on the couch and eat lard for the rest of my life!"
Whew, crisis averted!
I also have been unusually irritable since training, like chronic PMS. Not fun for anyone affected. So I decided to go have my blood checked. Surely my cholesterol has been affected by 1 and 2-hour workouts 5x a week right?
I talk to my nurse practitioner who happens to be participating in Noel and Shay's same triathlon. She too is perplexed by my fatness. She mildly insinuates that I may not be working out as much as I confess to be. At which point I mentally slap her strongly across her size 2 face. Boy, I hope she doesn't read my blog cuz my co-pays will increase fo' sure.
So we take some blood work. She says my testosterone levels may have increased with all my imaginary working-out. GREAT! Wrestlers quads and a full beard, oh and I'm still fat. Are we getting the visual here?
I got my lab results back and....GUESS WHAT?! My cholesterol has dropped 30 whoop'n points!! My LDL has dropped 30 points while HDL has gone up 2 points (that's good news). So basically my emaciated doctor has to now believe that I am working out. I am so proud of my body. And let me tell you, I needed some validation of what I am doing. I told Noel, "If there isn't a significant drop in my cholesterol I'm going to sit on the couch and eat lard for the rest of my life!"
Whew, crisis averted!
Saturday, June 13
Eager Mistress
My sisters and brother have been visiting our family this weekend. That means bed juggling. And THAT means we have one of our critters in our bed. This time it was Cora. She has become increasingly fascinating to chat with these days. She talks and thinks like a 13 year old girl. It makes me wonder when she is 13 does that mean she'll talk like a 25 year old woman? Probably.
So we covered the girl spectrum of topics and questions. She has encountered her first betrayal of girlfriends with a secret of hers. It really has wounded her. She brings it up and talks about losing her trust in them. Wasn't my 6 year old life so much simpler that this?
She asked when was the very soonest she could have make-up. I informed her that she already has make-up. This was met with first, confusion and second, denial. Yep, she has fingernail polish and clear lip gloss. This was met with first, acceptance and second, injustice.
On to fashion...the question was, "Mom, when I am a grown up can I have nothing but beautiful dresses and high heels in my closet?" I told her of course she could and that she can buy all those things herself. She was thrilled.
Boys, of course. She asked when was the VERY EARLIEST age that I would let her get married. I love the naivete. If only she'd seek my approval in 20 years when she does marry. But I played along because I totally believe in brainwashing my kids with all my theories on life. I told her the VERY SOONEST would be age 24. She also thinks that'll be her first time kissing.
Oh, so bittersweet her little dreams as reality comes smashing them all to bits.
So we covered the girl spectrum of topics and questions. She has encountered her first betrayal of girlfriends with a secret of hers. It really has wounded her. She brings it up and talks about losing her trust in them. Wasn't my 6 year old life so much simpler that this?
She asked when was the very soonest she could have make-up. I informed her that she already has make-up. This was met with first, confusion and second, denial. Yep, she has fingernail polish and clear lip gloss. This was met with first, acceptance and second, injustice.
On to fashion...the question was, "Mom, when I am a grown up can I have nothing but beautiful dresses and high heels in my closet?" I told her of course she could and that she can buy all those things herself. She was thrilled.
Boys, of course. She asked when was the VERY EARLIEST age that I would let her get married. I love the naivete. If only she'd seek my approval in 20 years when she does marry. But I played along because I totally believe in brainwashing my kids with all my theories on life. I told her the VERY SOONEST would be age 24. She also thinks that'll be her first time kissing.
Oh, so bittersweet her little dreams as reality comes smashing them all to bits.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
